Seven Years Part 2
Thanks to no one for reviewing the first part of the story *gives wry grin* I know it's not monday, but the last entry was fairly short, so I am adding early. Please go back and read it from the begining, or at least the last little bit. R&R everyone... half the reason I do this is so I can get people thoughts.
The cave’s interior was dark, so Shiek quickly began to light the small lamp that stood on the round table in the center of the room. She had barely lit the wick before her companions began to troop in.
“Not good…” came Toran’s voice as he tramped in, feet punishing the ground with unnecessary violence. “Third mission blown in as many weeks… anyone would think we are trying to get caught!”
“It couldn’t have been helped,” Scela replied, walking over to a large chest on the far side of the room, “somehow they knew we were coming. We should take pride that we got as far as we did, and be grateful that we made it out alive.”
Toran shook his head wearily as he sank into a chair, placing his katana on the table.
“Maybe so, but that was way too close. That Dark Knuckle was a freaking monster! I’ve never seen anything swing an axe like that! No offence, Draq…”
Draq gave a wry grin and collapsed into one of the stiff, wooden chair in the room. He let his long axe slip to the floor and began to massage his throbbing temples. Toran ran a hand through his lanky dirty-blond hair and glanced over to Shiek. He started, concern flashing in his hazel eyes. “Oh my goddess! You alright Shiek!?!”
She nodded and pulled down the cloth from her face, trying to give an unconcerned smile. From the wince that crossed Toran’s face, she figured she must look pretty bad.
“I’m sure it’s not as bad as it looks Toran… don’t worry about it.”
Scela looked up from the chest he had been putting his equipment in and made a face.
“I’m not so sure that’s the case, Shiek. Let me take a look.” The team’s archer, and aspiring medic, crossed over to her and forced the reluctant patient to take a seat. Scela had been apprenticed to the old scientist out on Lake Hylia before joining Shiek’s band, and had learned many things during his brief time with the land’s master potion maker. He was the youngest member of the team, barely seventeen years of age. He had the same jet black hair as his older brother Draq, but rather then sharing clear icy grey blue eyes, Scela’s large bright eyes were deep sapphire blue. Shiek waited patiently while his thin, skillful fingers brushed her face. She was fairly sure that even she weighed more then the thin boy. All in all, he was just too cute to be a boy. However, she knew the surprising power his thin frame possessed. Scela had a quick eye and wondrous coordination. He could shoot arrows, throw knives, and hurl light javelins as well as mix lake water.
Shiek winced and gulped down a cry as Scela’s probing fingers became a bit rougher.
“You’re cut really bad, Shy,” he murmured, using his pet name for her, “I need to wash this up.”
“Don’t call me Shy…” she hissed back, smiling slightly.
Toran fetched Scela a bowl of water and sat down close by with an anxious air about him. Scela mixed a pinch of red powder into the bowl and began to wash the dried blood off of Shiek’s face. Draq got up from his seat and declared was going out to indulge in his ‘vice,’ which was his word for going to Hyrule Plains after dark and collecting Poes to sell in town. For her part, Shiek was simply trying not to scream as Scela dabbed at her face. Her nose had bleed a good deal, but it was the deep cut that ran from under her left eye down to her lip that really worried the young medic.
“If I hadn’t caught this tonight it probably would have become infected, and at BEST left a huge scar,” Scela proclaimed, straightening up from her face, “But you’ll mend well enough to break hearts yet, Shy.” He smiled and gave the tip of her long pointy ear a playful tweak. Gathering the cloth and bowl, Scela departed through a door to one of the two rooms that were connected to the round main one.
“So, you ok then?” Toran still looked concerned as he pulled off the greenish cloth strip he used as a headband.
“Scela said I’d be fine… you heard him.”
“I wasn’t talking about your face Shiek.”
Shiek shrugged. “Just a little frazzled. It’s frustrating the way we never get anywhere nowadays. But I guess it’s just a string of bad luck; we’ll break out of it sooner or later… and if the worst thing that happens is my face gets scratched, then I’d say we’re really pretty lucky,” a smile played at the corners, “I wasn’t winning any beauty pageants anyway, right?” She pulled off her tight turban, letting her blond hair fall down in its single braid. Sighing softly, Shiek sank back in the chair, flicking a long bang with a finger and watching it fall back into place.
Toran watched her graceful movement. Shiek vehemently denied any claim that she was good looking, but if she really believed she was plain she was alone in the thought. She had the pointed, sharply defined features common to Hylians, but they look more becoming on the slender blond then most. Some might have found her dark red eyes odd, but few would call them anything but pretty. As Toran watched Shiek enjoy a little down time with her hair, he felt an odd feeling spread through him. He had always cared about her, but recently he had been feeling something else too. He couldn’t give the feeling a name, but he knew that every time she got hurt, he felt pain too, and that he was always worried about what might happen to her.
“When does it end, Shiek?” he asked, concern in his voice.
“What do you mean?” she responded, eyes closed and still running a hand lightly through her hair.
“I mean when does it end. We’ve been fight for close on to seven years. When do we stop?”
Her red eyes opened halfway to get a look at him.
“When Gannondorf dies.”
“I don’t want to burst your bubble Shiek, but we couldn’t even find the treasure of the Spirit Temple. How the hell are we going to kill Gannondorf?”
“We won’t have to. The Hero of Time-”
“Doesn’t exist, Shiek. We’ve been waiting for this ‘hero’ for seven years. Where is he?”
“He will come Toran; I know he will.”
“How can you know that?”
Shiek reached out and put a hand on Toran’s knee. Her eyes looked searchingly at his face.
“Because it is true. Please Toran, even if you don’t trust the stories you surely trust me.”
Toran gave a wry grin and nodded.
“I didn’t trust anyone before I met you, Shiek.”
Shiek returned the smile. She knew Toran had experienced a very rough childhood. Orphaned at age six, he had lived for nearly seven years by fighting, scavenging, and occasionally thieving until Impa had showed in the village bringing Shiek with her. He had hung around them quite a bit. For some reason he had never asked why the new girl passed herself as a boy, and he kept her secret perfectly, so Impa no harm in the scruffy orphan. As the two grew older, they began to work together to fight against Gannondorf’s regime. At first they had done little more then prank guards, but before long they had started a more serious resistance. Shiek had never told Toran why she had to hide who she was, nor had she told him about her past, but if he ever asked she felt sure she would. She trusted him with everything, just as he trusted her.
Toran stood up and retied his green headband. Slinging his katana over his shoulder in a fluid motion, Toran turned to the cave entrance.
“I’m going to make sure Draq is doing ok… we wouldn’t want our best axe-man to get hurt gathering gaming money.”
Shiek nodded, though she had doubts as to whether Draq spent his extra money on games. As Toran exited the cave, Shiek heard him give a startled greeting. Shiek sighed. Only one person would have elicited such a response.
The cave’s interior was dark, so Shiek quickly began to light the small lamp that stood on the round table in the center of the room. She had barely lit the wick before her companions began to troop in.
“Not good…” came Toran’s voice as he tramped in, feet punishing the ground with unnecessary violence. “Third mission blown in as many weeks… anyone would think we are trying to get caught!”
“It couldn’t have been helped,” Scela replied, walking over to a large chest on the far side of the room, “somehow they knew we were coming. We should take pride that we got as far as we did, and be grateful that we made it out alive.”
Toran shook his head wearily as he sank into a chair, placing his katana on the table.
“Maybe so, but that was way too close. That Dark Knuckle was a freaking monster! I’ve never seen anything swing an axe like that! No offence, Draq…”
Draq gave a wry grin and collapsed into one of the stiff, wooden chair in the room. He let his long axe slip to the floor and began to massage his throbbing temples. Toran ran a hand through his lanky dirty-blond hair and glanced over to Shiek. He started, concern flashing in his hazel eyes. “Oh my goddess! You alright Shiek!?!”
She nodded and pulled down the cloth from her face, trying to give an unconcerned smile. From the wince that crossed Toran’s face, she figured she must look pretty bad.
“I’m sure it’s not as bad as it looks Toran… don’t worry about it.”
Scela looked up from the chest he had been putting his equipment in and made a face.
“I’m not so sure that’s the case, Shiek. Let me take a look.” The team’s archer, and aspiring medic, crossed over to her and forced the reluctant patient to take a seat. Scela had been apprenticed to the old scientist out on Lake Hylia before joining Shiek’s band, and had learned many things during his brief time with the land’s master potion maker. He was the youngest member of the team, barely seventeen years of age. He had the same jet black hair as his older brother Draq, but rather then sharing clear icy grey blue eyes, Scela’s large bright eyes were deep sapphire blue. Shiek waited patiently while his thin, skillful fingers brushed her face. She was fairly sure that even she weighed more then the thin boy. All in all, he was just too cute to be a boy. However, she knew the surprising power his thin frame possessed. Scela had a quick eye and wondrous coordination. He could shoot arrows, throw knives, and hurl light javelins as well as mix lake water.
Shiek winced and gulped down a cry as Scela’s probing fingers became a bit rougher.
“You’re cut really bad, Shy,” he murmured, using his pet name for her, “I need to wash this up.”
“Don’t call me Shy…” she hissed back, smiling slightly.
Toran fetched Scela a bowl of water and sat down close by with an anxious air about him. Scela mixed a pinch of red powder into the bowl and began to wash the dried blood off of Shiek’s face. Draq got up from his seat and declared was going out to indulge in his ‘vice,’ which was his word for going to Hyrule Plains after dark and collecting Poes to sell in town. For her part, Shiek was simply trying not to scream as Scela dabbed at her face. Her nose had bleed a good deal, but it was the deep cut that ran from under her left eye down to her lip that really worried the young medic.
“If I hadn’t caught this tonight it probably would have become infected, and at BEST left a huge scar,” Scela proclaimed, straightening up from her face, “But you’ll mend well enough to break hearts yet, Shy.” He smiled and gave the tip of her long pointy ear a playful tweak. Gathering the cloth and bowl, Scela departed through a door to one of the two rooms that were connected to the round main one.
“So, you ok then?” Toran still looked concerned as he pulled off the greenish cloth strip he used as a headband.
“Scela said I’d be fine… you heard him.”
“I wasn’t talking about your face Shiek.”
Shiek shrugged. “Just a little frazzled. It’s frustrating the way we never get anywhere nowadays. But I guess it’s just a string of bad luck; we’ll break out of it sooner or later… and if the worst thing that happens is my face gets scratched, then I’d say we’re really pretty lucky,” a smile played at the corners, “I wasn’t winning any beauty pageants anyway, right?” She pulled off her tight turban, letting her blond hair fall down in its single braid. Sighing softly, Shiek sank back in the chair, flicking a long bang with a finger and watching it fall back into place.
Toran watched her graceful movement. Shiek vehemently denied any claim that she was good looking, but if she really believed she was plain she was alone in the thought. She had the pointed, sharply defined features common to Hylians, but they look more becoming on the slender blond then most. Some might have found her dark red eyes odd, but few would call them anything but pretty. As Toran watched Shiek enjoy a little down time with her hair, he felt an odd feeling spread through him. He had always cared about her, but recently he had been feeling something else too. He couldn’t give the feeling a name, but he knew that every time she got hurt, he felt pain too, and that he was always worried about what might happen to her.
“When does it end, Shiek?” he asked, concern in his voice.
“What do you mean?” she responded, eyes closed and still running a hand lightly through her hair.
“I mean when does it end. We’ve been fight for close on to seven years. When do we stop?”
Her red eyes opened halfway to get a look at him.
“When Gannondorf dies.”
“I don’t want to burst your bubble Shiek, but we couldn’t even find the treasure of the Spirit Temple. How the hell are we going to kill Gannondorf?”
“We won’t have to. The Hero of Time-”
“Doesn’t exist, Shiek. We’ve been waiting for this ‘hero’ for seven years. Where is he?”
“He will come Toran; I know he will.”
“How can you know that?”
Shiek reached out and put a hand on Toran’s knee. Her eyes looked searchingly at his face.
“Because it is true. Please Toran, even if you don’t trust the stories you surely trust me.”
Toran gave a wry grin and nodded.
“I didn’t trust anyone before I met you, Shiek.”
Shiek returned the smile. She knew Toran had experienced a very rough childhood. Orphaned at age six, he had lived for nearly seven years by fighting, scavenging, and occasionally thieving until Impa had showed in the village bringing Shiek with her. He had hung around them quite a bit. For some reason he had never asked why the new girl passed herself as a boy, and he kept her secret perfectly, so Impa no harm in the scruffy orphan. As the two grew older, they began to work together to fight against Gannondorf’s regime. At first they had done little more then prank guards, but before long they had started a more serious resistance. Shiek had never told Toran why she had to hide who she was, nor had she told him about her past, but if he ever asked she felt sure she would. She trusted him with everything, just as he trusted her.
Toran stood up and retied his green headband. Slinging his katana over his shoulder in a fluid motion, Toran turned to the cave entrance.
“I’m going to make sure Draq is doing ok… we wouldn’t want our best axe-man to get hurt gathering gaming money.”
Shiek nodded, though she had doubts as to whether Draq spent his extra money on games. As Toran exited the cave, Shiek heard him give a startled greeting. Shiek sighed. Only one person would have elicited such a response.
posted by Czar at 5:25 PM
5 Comments:
Okay, so what - I emailed you my comments on installment one because I didn't know if you wanted all on the blog. I'll be sure to fix that from now on! Eeish, no rest for the weary… :-P
I'm sensing an "aloneness" in Sheik. She sees something no one else does. Her friends seem to respect her for it, even if they don’t agree. I don't know enough about the story to know if she has actually seen/met the Hero of Time (which I'm assuming is Link), or if anyone else has. She is fighting for him, holding out for his return at least. But what is their relationship - is he a savior, a national hero, or something else, more dear and personal to her? And will it get in the way of the affections of her comrades in arms?
Now, I guess my biggest question is, if she is a princess or whatever she is, but she's known these guys so long, and it's not been a superficial friendship. They know her well. How can this be? And obviously they don't see her first as a ruler. Does that bother her? Or is it that they're the only people who see her as anything other than that, and as a woman, who bleeds when she’s cut (no pun intended) and has all the emotions of any other being in their world? But this isn’t so much a criticism of the work as wondering of where the plot will go.
For something more clear, I am wondering how Draq is pronounced… :-P Also, we were having a debate about this: was Scela flirting with Sheik? Not that it really matters, since he seems to just be the little brother, but good to have around.
My ambiguous comment of the day will be this: it will be interesting to see how the scar heals. I’ll tell you why I say that later.
Otherwise, I like the darkness of the story. As always, looking forward to more, and I’m glad Monday came twice this week!
D-r(rolled, but in the slavic way not the spanish way)- short a. The Q makes no sound, but looks cool... and its part of his full name.
The other was to look at it is to say that Dr-ack with the "dr" pronounced via standard english.
As for the rest of the team not knowing Shiek is Princess Zelda, you forget... these are guys... they don't ask question like that... If a girl (IE Shiek) doesnt explictly say something, it just never comes up... I think this reflects the world fairly realisiticly.
I am actually suprised no one has asked how Scela's name is pronounced. The short anwser to that is: I don't really know. His name was designed on its visual effect. I wanted something that would maybe hint that Scela was smaller, younger, and less masculine then his brother or Toran. Scela looked softer, and is actually modled off a girl's name.
Lee, based on your comments about Shiek, her relationship with the team, and flirting, I will say you are in for one WILD ride.
PS: in the game Link is virtually and unknown figure. Only Zelda, Impa, and one of the Sages know he is the hero of time. He has been gone for roughly seven years at the point when this story takes place, having disipeared the night Gannondorf took over the kingdom. The general populace of Hyrule know the stories of a Hero of Time that will one day come and save them, but no one knows Link is that hero. Also, the stories are given about as much credance as the story that King Auther will return in Britian's darkest hour.
Hope that helps the people who do not have a great knowledge of the game!
Czar
Mmmmok.... so.... another random comment, since apparantly they don't know she is Princess Zelda, I'm guessing that she's not really already assumed the duties of her title, meaning, she's more an heir-to-the-throne than an actual "I'm in charge of Hyrule"?
And along those lines, the dieties appear to be female, correct? So this is something of a matriarchial society?
Per your request for more detailed comments:
I like the story as a whole and enjoy your ability to use dialog to move the story.
Concerning the first sentence: duh…caves are always dark. Also, you say she began to light the lamp which stood on the table in the middle of the room – does she just have a sense of the cave that she knows where the table is? Because if it is really dark then how can she see the table to light the lamp? Why not have a table by the door to light the lamp? Ok, so this is Miss. Literal speaking, it was just something that stood out to me. *small smile*
As I said above, I like the way your characters interact with their dialogue – I am able to “hear” them. You also are able to portray what the character is like via their dialogue, which is quite an ability. I am just wondering if there is any way to also include a little more description of the surroundings. I know that I completely lack any knowledge of the game so that is one reason I don’t know much of the setting, but is there any way to give a picture of how things look? The lay of the land, the cave, the different places they may go, etc? Just a thought… I realize that you might like to leave some of this up to the imagination of the reader, but I thought it might be beneficial to give the story more “reality”.
Unlike Lee, I do not see any flirting going on between Scela and Shy…I see it as a brother/sister relationship…at least from what I know right now. Out of curiosity, do you want there to be some confusion on their relationship?
That is all for now…as I said above, I like the characters and the story – keep up the good work. Like Lee I look forward to the Monday additions.
Ok first off, you are right Sarah. Everyone knows caves are dark, but it sonds very dull to say "It was a cave with a table in it. There was a lamp on the table. Shiek lit the lamp." That is so droll its Disgusting. In fact I almost vomited just writing it. So you picked up nicely on that. State the obvious for artistic reasons. Thanks for the input! And feel free to hold your own thoughts about Scela and Shiek, Sarah... after all I didn't say Lee was right, I just didn't say she was wrong. Of course, I just did the same thing to you... *wry grin*
Lee, sorry that you are obviously missing a few things here, and this will become more obvious as the story progresses. I will now state things in the clearest way possible, since you seem to be missing them.
1) Shiek IS the rightful ruler of Hyrule.
2) Gannondorf rules Hyrule
3) Gannondorf is most certainly NOT related to Shiek in any way.
4) He really, really, really wants to kill off Princess Zelda, the last member of Hyrule's true ruling family.
5) Shiek=Zelda, Zelda=Shiek, but only Shiek, Impa, and one person yet to be introduced know that. This is also why Shiek pretends to be a boy BTW.
That help?
I know it's tricky reading a story based on a game you haven't played. (and sarah, go to elfwood.com and look for drawlings of Shiek, Zelda, Link, Impa, Malon and Hyrule if you want. Not all of them are good, but most are, and it may give you a better feel for the world I am writing in. You will also see why I had to shout about Shiek really been a girl who uses clothes and magic to hide herself as a male, because not everyone takes that view... the losers...)
Czar
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